These things are robots that are supposed to clean your house.
Have you seen the advertising for these things?
They’re shiny and beautiful and merry…like Hobbits.
Little cleany Star Wars robots.
The reality?
They’re filthy.
Covered with dust and dings from where you accidentally kicked it across the room in the middle of the night.
They’re covered in dust trailing a 16 inch clump of dog hair and boogers and God knows what else.
They’re supposed to be the most brilliant technology, too.
Super smart.
But have you ever watched one of these things gimp around a room?
They get stuck.
They sit and bump a chair leg for 15 minutes
They’ll work in the same 4 square foot area for half an hour.
“Mapping it.”
And this is how you know Skynet is BS.
Machines will never take over the world!
We will never have robot overlords.
How do we know this?
Because this thing spends 45 minutes on the strugglebus trying to figure out how to get out from under the living room couch.
How are these things ever going to destroy humanity?
One of these little Robot things won’t make it 10 minutes on the side of the freeway in Philadelphia or Oakland.
They’ll have that thing stripped and up on blocks in the blink of an eye.
You know who is terrified of them, though.
The dog.
My dog is terrified of the Roomba.
Watches it uneasily as it sits unmoving in its charging station.
Terrifying Man’s best friend.
Score one for Skynet.
Your move, Humanity.